road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
