They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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