She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
she peed on how many people?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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