hotel room ftw
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
