Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
