Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
