Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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