That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
