after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
