I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
she pinky promised me she was 18
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
