can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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