I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize