Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
