Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
