Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday