there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
