yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
