Umm I'm too high to move.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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