This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
