He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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