so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Randomize