Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
