just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
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