k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
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We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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