the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize