even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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