doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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