am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.