I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
