i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
