I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
