Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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