): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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