Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize
