he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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