he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
