she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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