Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I smell like Dick and happiness
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