I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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