She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
