therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
