Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize