Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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