good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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