i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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