I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize