I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize