I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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