Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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