hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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