I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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